rated x (2000)

the "is this worth watching for lawrence dane" rating: 0/5

he doesn't show up until an hour into the movie (-1); he only has the one scene (-1); the movie's script is weak and the direction is a hot mess (-2); it has charlie sheen (-100000).

the plot: a potentially interesting biopic about the brothers responsible for "behind the green door" and key players in the onset of the brief era known as porno chic. the movie kind of gets into the legality & ethics of it all but cares more about the interpersonal drama between the brothers and doesn't do justice to either topic. maybe if you go into this with rock-bottom expectations you'll find it enjoyable despite charlie sheen?

despite having an almost two-hour runtime it feels like the movie was trying to cram in too much and didn't have a clear vision beyond "check out these two assholes". like, why even bother to incorporate dane's turn as a mafioso if they're not coming back to the mafia poaching the movie due to lax intellectual property/copyright protections for erotica? what was the point? don't get me wrong, great look for him, fun performance, but why was it necessary? there's a lot of scenes that seem like they're supposed to be connected to something else but ultimately aren't. disappointing.

( scene starts with him holding up a nudie mag so enjoy but also beware )

this time i swear next review will be the littlest hobo episode. he was very cute and charming and one of the main characters to boot. a great palate cleanser after the trainwreck of this movie.